Children lie to avoid punishment, to win respect, or because they are threatened with power. Nowadays many parents teach their youngsters to lie and encourage them in the practice.
Model Integrity Yourself
Youngsters who lie often have parents who lie, and very quickly younger ones learn from their example.
They hear what you are saying on the phone. All the lies you lie about your husband not being at home while he is in front of you watching TV.
To teach integrity to your child, be sincere with him or her yourself.
When your children are challenged with a problem, don’t expect them to respond with sincerity if you aren’t sincere with them.
For example, you lost some huge amount of money due to failed investment and you can’t take your children to the cinema.
But you sweet tongue the whole situation, thinking that you are preventing your child the anguish of knowing you lost some huge amount of money due to failed business investment.
Here is another example; your little darling’s granny has been seriously hospitalized due to partial stroke.
Telling your child that everything is fine when he or she has witnessed the discomfort in the family will cause disorientation and fear.
It is always good if you establish an open conversation and take obstruction as a favorable circumstance to point out that you can trust God in your discomforts.
Don’t give your child the convenience to lie; rather, make it easy for him or her to be candid in his or her dealings.
For example, you laid down a certain rule and regulation in your home and you expect your children to obey them. But you know for sure that your little darling didn’t obey them.
Please don’t say, “Did you break the rules and regulations?” Instead, say, “why did you break the rules?” it gives your little darling a reason to explain his or her behavior rather than to tell lies.
Open conversation is actually the best so that your child will have the freedom to say, “I don’t think that you are being fair in what you are doing!” That can be done without anger and dishonest attitude.
The open conversation gives room to children to express their feelings without being dishonest or talking in a disrespectful manner.
To teach integrity, stress the fact that what others may do is different from what you observe in your family.
Nowadays kids have the tendency of understanding the truth about integrity. Child psychologists says that by age four most kids can sift fantasy from the truth.
When they have playmates that make it a practice to lie, you must teach your children that integrity is a fundamental matter of trust and love in your family, and help them to understand that when trust is lost, it affects your relationship.
If the character of other youngsters begins to run off, put those youngsters off limits.
Learning that you still love and accept a child when he or she behaved unacceptably helps your child to be honest with you, regardless of the consequences.
Integrity is the best policy, it’s the only method to build an intimate relationship that lasts.
Raising Godly Kids 52 Guidelines for Counter-Culture Parenting HAROLD J. SOLA, Christian Publications 2001